1. Taking fatherhood away from my husband
The worse part about having a hysterectomy was the impact it had on my wonderful husband. It’s bad enough knowing that I will never be a parent, but inflicting the same future onto him is much worse. He has been nothing, but loving and considerate throughout the whole ordeal, and I feel lucky to have someone who is so understanding. I know he feels his own pain and for that I am really sorry. I Love you G xx
2. Having too many choices!
After getting married, it was always in the plan to have children shortly after. That’s what people do, that’s what we wanted and we were ready. Without that option we are still unsure about what to do with our lives. The possibilities are endless, which can be a good thing, but it can also be very unsettling. Of course, we have thought about adoption, fostering and surrogacy. All these have their positives and negatives and all have been discussed at length. So, what about skipping the children thing altogther and maybe just get a dog? That too is an option. I could go back to uni, maybe change my career. G wants to move to Canada and build a straw bale house! The path we are on has many avenues, but knowing which one to take is a mine field.
3. Feeling worlds apart from friends.
Before my friends started popping out their off spring, talking on the phone with them was a pleasure. I could chat for hours, catching up, gossiping and pouring out my heart and soul. Those days have now gone. It is virtually impossible to have a good conversation with anyone who has a child under ten. We try, we are pateint, but there comes a time when you just have to say “I’ll call you back at a more convenient time.” The only problem is, there is never a more convenient time. Basically, I have loads of spare time, and they don’t. It becomes difficult to see them, talk to them and just spend quality time together.
4. Have you got children?
This is a simple enough question, and I don’t mind answering it. However, when I say “no,” it never seems to end there. The next question will be either:
Why, don’t you want them?
Not yet eh?
Are you planning to have them?
I don’t want to embarrass anyone, but if they continue to ask questions I have to continue to answer them. In the end, the enquirer apologises profusely and makes a sharp exit, leaving both of us feeling awkward.
5. Watching families doing family things.
Sometimes, watching mums and dads having a good old family day out can make me feel…. Well, sad. There’s no other word to describe it really. There was a point in time when I had to stop going on facebook for fear of seeing baby pictures, with comments like ” Being a mum is the best thing in the world!” Thanks for that, some of us can’t be, I wanted to reply.
What are your top 5?